it finally happened
after a long journey back from sydney & dealing w/ dumb fucking customs people, i made my usual journey from terminal 4 to 1 at LAX. it's like the walk of shame 
once getting thru security, i always go to the bar & get some pizza and beer from the CPK/Biercsh combo. it's always a nice treat to welcome me back to americana. after enjoying my beers, i then boarded the plane to head back to the zone. things were going decent for me being tired & irked by american security extremes generated by d-bags.
there i was sitting in the front of the plane in a non-full flight & the middle seat was open (i was window). nice...should be an enjoyable flight w/ my drink coupons too. all of a suddent the last person to board was tons of fun. one of those fat annoying bitches who think they're the shit & the world is theirs. great. she sits next to me. well this cunt started overflowing in my seat & i ain't a fan of that, so i hold my own on the armrest & take up as much room as reasonably possible.
flight leaves & it's like whatever. tons of fun already irked me, but now it was time for my drink. red wine would be the choice to help ease me to napville for the remainder of the flight & to help bounce back from returning from australia. get me drink & start sipping on it. i don't drop the tray since it rests on my knees & doesn't sit flat. don't like that either. i hold on to my drink when all of sudden orca starts to free herself from the net (seatbelt). bitch hits my arm w/ all her movement & i now have red shorts & spotted shirt.
fatty patty doesn't even care. she looks at me like it's my fault. oh you bitch. u already fukt my flight by sitting next to me. while she has this smug look, i casually say she should go on a diet & then i start the cleanup. my head is down as i'm cleaning up & she slaps me. that's right, she slapped me. as a reaction to getting hit after years of abuse from tatonka, i throw a bow to shrug her off. caught her face. that didn't go over too well. more seat slapping/fighting continued for a hot sec. stewards didn't like our fighting. they had police waiting for us on our arrival to phoenix. sweet. let's both press charges. there are now 2 aggravated assault cases pending. one on me. one on her. i hate this flying shit.
once getting thru security, i always go to the bar & get some pizza and beer from the CPK/Biercsh combo. it's always a nice treat to welcome me back to americana. after enjoying my beers, i then boarded the plane to head back to the zone. things were going decent for me being tired & irked by american security extremes generated by d-bags.
there i was sitting in the front of the plane in a non-full flight & the middle seat was open (i was window). nice...should be an enjoyable flight w/ my drink coupons too. all of a suddent the last person to board was tons of fun. one of those fat annoying bitches who think they're the shit & the world is theirs. great. she sits next to me. well this cunt started overflowing in my seat & i ain't a fan of that, so i hold my own on the armrest & take up as much room as reasonably possible.
flight leaves & it's like whatever. tons of fun already irked me, but now it was time for my drink. red wine would be the choice to help ease me to napville for the remainder of the flight & to help bounce back from returning from australia. get me drink & start sipping on it. i don't drop the tray since it rests on my knees & doesn't sit flat. don't like that either. i hold on to my drink when all of sudden orca starts to free herself from the net (seatbelt). bitch hits my arm w/ all her movement & i now have red shorts & spotted shirt.
fatty patty doesn't even care. she looks at me like it's my fault. oh you bitch. u already fukt my flight by sitting next to me. while she has this smug look, i casually say she should go on a diet & then i start the cleanup. my head is down as i'm cleaning up & she slaps me. that's right, she slapped me. as a reaction to getting hit after years of abuse from tatonka, i throw a bow to shrug her off. caught her face. that didn't go over too well. more seat slapping/fighting continued for a hot sec. stewards didn't like our fighting. they had police waiting for us on our arrival to phoenix. sweet. let's both press charges. there are now 2 aggravated assault cases pending. one on me. one on her. i hate this flying shit.
i always end up sitting next to those people!!! last week, i went to boston for a business trip & i got stuck next to this fat lady cuz the airline decided to overbook the damn flight. she was so fat that we couldn't put the armrest down between us. umm, she should have paid for half of my seat too since she was in it more than me!!! my back was so cramped by the end of the flight from trying to keep my distance from her, but there was only so much room for me to scoot over as i was mashed up agaist the window & her gigantic thigh...at least i had the window to brace myself against. it's happened to me at least 4 or 5 times already.
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